It's been almost a YEAR?

You guys, I so have to apologize. I actually forgot that I had this blog! I feel terrible because SO MUCH stuff has been going on in the months since my last post at the beginning of the year. Let me try to break it down...

January-March 2016
I moved into a new home and continued to work at the nursing home, happily. The work was hard, the pay was low, but as you know, I had an ultimate goal in mind.

April-May 2016
I found out that I was pregnant on the day that Prince died, so I immediately informed my job. so that I could be put on light duty. They wouldn't do it because they were losing staff left and right, and were already short. I had a miscarriage, very likely due to the stress and heavy lifting at my job. I quit, heartbroken and disgusted. One week after my D&C, I got a call for an interview at a hospital that I used to work at. (Remember the ram in the bush)

June-Present
I began working at the hospital that I had been trying to get back into for EIGHT years! My director is amazing and everyone has welcomed me back with open arms-I can't even believe that so many people remembered me. In any case, I came back to the hospital with a new frame of mind. I wanted to be engaged in my job and not just be there to dredge through my 12 hour shift and collect a check. Both of my parents were stand out employees at their jobs, and I'm sure that some of what made them so trickled down into my genetic makeup.  Soon I'll write a post about getting engaged in your career. Anyway, I love it, and although some changes are taking place that I do not like (there's a story behind that, too), I'm taking it in stride because it's not affecting my job or how I do it.

In saving the best news for last, I FINALLY enrolled in school again. I met with an academic advisor and got all of my BS straight, so that I could continue on with my prerequisites. Right now, I'm enrolled in Composition & Literature as well as Sociology. I have a test to take call the TEAS before I can officially be considered a "nursing student", and before I can take that  test, I have to take my biology class.  In any case, it's time for work, so  wish me luck on my journey towards my RN, and I promise not to forget this blog again, shame on me.

The Ram in the Bush

Oooh....this is the post where I could literally write a novel about what's been going on in my life for the past 8 weeks. I'll spare you the deets and will give you the short version with the lessons learned- here we go!

In my first few posts, I made points to say that a moment of fury can end your career. I also said find your inner peace and a few other things. Well let me tell you....I searched and searched for my inner peace and still got fired from my call center job. What I will say is that the reason was ridiculous, and my displeasure for the way immediate and corporate management handles their business was noted (loudly at times) and thus there went my job. Prior to this catastrophe, I had taken all of the measures that I have previously written about; I meditated, prayed, and even colored to soothe my nerves. But when you are in a place where you are not supposed to be, God will remove you. Please overstand THIS-I tried to hold on to that job because it was easy...you answer calls and make appointments. The pay was enough to handle the things that I have to do, but let this be the lesson:

1. You cannot put a dollar amount on your peace of mind. I went to that job every day with the best of intentions and left angry and stressed after every shift. It wasn't the co-workers, nor was it the patients who were calling, it was the management and the management only. Micro managing the employees and desperately looking for fault plus a turnover rate of over 60% is a recipe for disaster for an employee like me. I have to voice my opinion if I see something that I don't like. And don't get me wrong, I do follow the rules (chain of command), but when they constantly fall on deaf ears, you have to speak louder. Long story short, I'm not mad about it, I'm relieved. Which brings me to lesson number 2.

2. When you have a calling on your life, please know that you can voluntarily follow the path or you can be forced down it. This whole blog is about me becoming a nurse. Making a few dollars for doing something easy is good and all but when that's not what you were put on this earth to do, it will not be fit to your life. Period. I could feel myself fading away from that job...I just wasn't into it anymore. But instead of resigning, I stayed, let it get the best of my emotions, and I ended up getting terminated. I deserved that because I knew months ago that I didn't belong there. The moment I became serious about becoming a nurse is the moment that I should have left that job. I am meant to care for people in a medical capacity and scheduling appointments for them to see a doctor is not what I'm talking about. Sometimes people would call with symptoms and in my mind, the cure was easy, but in that job, I would have to say "I'm not medically trained, so I can't give advice". It was like a slap in my face every time.

Credit:biblelessonsonsite.org

3. There is always a ram in the bush. If you are not familiar with this popular Christian phrase, it derives from the story of Abraham and Isaac. Basically, Abraham was told by God to sacrifice his first son, Isaac. Reluctantly, Abraham prepared to do so, but as he was going to the mountain top to kill his son as an offering to the Lord, he saw a "Ram in the thicket (see: bush)", and used the ram as a sacrifice instead of his son. The point here is, we move on God's time, not ours. And you better believe that HE is always on time and He will provide all of your needs! Check this out, I was fired at 12 pm, I went to my part time job at 12:20 pm and left with a full time schedule at 12:45 pm. I went home, changed into my scrubs and started working at 3:00 pm! God is faithful! You see, I tried to hold on to that call center job as long as I could,but it was my time to go. I will get nowhere in my career by holding on whats not meant for me. I will get where I need to be by doing the work that I'm supposed to do, and at this time, my purpose is bedside care. Forget the pay difference..I haven't had a headache since I left the call center building! I look forward to going to work again, I smile at work, I don't mind walking back and forth over and over again! Does somebody out there understand what I mean?

Overall, I think the biggest lesson is to live IN your purpose ON purpose. Make it a point to do what it is that you are meant to do. For me it's nursing work,and while I'm at the beginning stages right now, best believe that I will steadily climb my way to the top! I think that's enough for this post, you guys have a wonderful day!

Accomplishment #1 !!!

Hey guys, I have some really awesome news for you today! So I get to class and everything was going as usual. After reviewing a chapter on caring for moms and newborns, my instructor pulled me and another student out of the classroom. Of course, I'm like Good Lord, what did I do now! She actually informed me that since we have the highest percentages in the class, she wanted us to take our State exam. Like right now. What was I gonna do, say no? In my mind I'm freaking out because this test determines whether or not I will get my license back.  I didn't even get to study!!!! So long story short, we found an empty conference room and pored over the test. I checked, double checked,triple checked and checked again all 100 questions. I marked some that I was unsure of so that I could go back to review. I changed some answers and I wrote out my thinking process over others. An hour later, I walked my test back down the hall to my instructor and watched her grade it with her blue pen in one hand and pink highlighter in the other. Every time she made a mark on my paper, I cringed a bit. At the end she looked up at me and in her Texas accent said, "Good lord lave mercy child, I knew you could do it!" I GOT A 92% ON MY STATE BOARDS!!!! 

Now. Me being the nit picky anal student that I am, I looked over my test and immediately got a little sour. Four of the questions, I should have gotten right. Two had the correct answer before I changed it and the other two I knew, but I had not read the question thoroughly enough. Simple misunderstandings and second guessing. I do it all the time. So instead of the 96 %, I got a 92% and I'll have to be happy with that. Anyway, she marched me down to the administrator's office and made me show her my test. After she gave me the biggest hug, she encouraged me to keep going beyond my CNA/GNA and use my potential to be an awesome nurse. Good ol' Fran Wheat- If only she knew the plans I have for myself. She'll be prouder than she was today!

So the hard part of the class is over and I'll be finished with it in about 2 weeks. I just received a letter in the mail stating that I'm eligible for Federal Student Aid and you better believe that if I can use it, I'm going for it. If I can get the Feds to pay for my undergrad, That will be the best thing ever. I'll keep you updated, but in the meantime, check out my happy dance.

RN 101: Finding Inner Peace In Conflict

So you guys don’t know me well yet, but you will. As a precursor, I’ll tell you that I’m a Scorpio….a full BLOWN Scorpio-and I was born on “The Day of Conflicting Karma”, whatever that means. One day I’ll have time to tell you about my…vivid personality.  So, I just celebrated my 33^rd birthday and I feel like I’ve been in full Scorpio mode ever since. A week after my birthday, my car was backed into by a lady who was applying lipstick while driving. I was obviously upset but then my “think-like-a-nurse” light clicked on and instead of losing my temper, I just maintained a cool demeanor and went through the motions with the police and insurance and such.

What does that have to do with you becoming a nurse, you may ask? Well, let me tell you! As I mentioned before, I had a temper problem that caused me to lose my CNA license before. Since then, I have of course matured, but every now and then, I encounter situations where I can just feel myself about to fly off the handle. I do try my VERY best to always think first, so the angry me is rarely seen these days. But in the middle of this accident situation, I kept looking at my car, and looking at this lady with the red lipstick smudged all around her eye and nose, and back again to my car thinking I deserve to lose my cool a little bit. But what if this was a patient who will not follow imperative doctor’s orders? Or what if it was a family member who is upset about their family’s treatment, or what if it was a staff member who is losing it for whatever reason? Would it be appropriate for me to lose my mind and go completely off? Heck no!

It’s always necessary to remain calm enough to think your situation through. The incident that caused me to have to surrender my first CNA license was a difficult situation, but it could have been handled in a different way. Taking time to catch your breath can make a world of difference and not doing so can surely make or break your career. If you read nothing else on this blog, please read, reread, and remember that. A moment of mishandled frustration could potentially end your career. The best way to handle it is to prevent it, so I thought that I’d give you a few ways to find your inner calm.

1. Meditate. I swear some moons ago when people would tell me that they meditate, I would automatically assume that they were children of hippies. It seemed so weird  and unnecessary to me until I tried it. It took me a while to get myself into it, but I quickly found that when done correctly, it really centered my mood and made me feel a little better. Now, it took me a little longer to get focused because I’m distracted by every.little.thing! I started at 5 minutes and gradually worked my way up to 30 minutes. Now I find that I need my quiet time. For me, as soon as I wake up is best. I can start my day with a clear mind and I find that I can handle situations much smoother. Breathe in…breathe out…listen to the breath come into and leave your body. It works.

2. Pray. Personally, I believe in God, so this is a necessity for me. I don’t take an hour to pray but I do say a silent prayer as soon as I realize that I’m awake. A quick thank you, Lord; or please give me the strength to put my feet on the floor, Lord. I often pray en route to work or class…just to let God know that I’m thankful to be tired because I asked to be a nurse and it’s happening for me. I need prayer to get through my day. I pray when I’m getting good news, or when something works out in my favor. And for those times when things are SO bad, I pray because it is all I know how to do.

3. Find a hobby. I love, love, LOVE to craft and write. When I break out my Cricut or my laptop, just know it’s about to go down. I love creating things and piecing things together to make something beautiful. I love decorating my home with Pinterest DIY’s and decorating baby showers or birthday parties. It makes me happy and makes me leave the nursing hoopla behind for a moment or two. Find what you enjoy, whether it’s crafting, hiking, or whatever. All work and no play is boring, and you’ll end up hating the career you worked so hard to get into.

4. Enjoy family and friends. Well obviously this list is in no particular order, because I revel in the love of my family. I have to go find my nieces and nephews a couple time a week just to love on them and play with blocks or do tummy time….anything! I adore them. I also love talking to my parents and granny just to see how their day is going. I have to let them know that even though I’m knee deep in A & P, I’m still thinking about them. Plus, my family has the most awesome gatherings. Too much fun. Period.  

5. Find something to be grateful for. True story-this morning, I got up to get a bottle of water out of the fridge and I was truly, honestly thankful that I had a refrigerator to open and something inside to take out of it. You see, in this field, you come across so many people who are in unfortunate situations. Some are hospital bound and have a slim chance of returning to their home to live their normal life. Some are grateful to be in a hospital where they know that someone will be there to check on them-to ask them if they need anything. I am often taking inventory of my life, and sometimes I get so frustrated because something does not go my way, but I make myself snap out of it because all things considered, I'm blessed! I can get warm if I'm cold. I can go to the store if I run out of laundry detergent or eggs. I can still pick up the phone and call both of my parents. I have so much to be appreciative of. If you think about it, I KNOW that you can list at least 50 things that you're grateful for. 

6.Be aware in the moment. This is so important! When your in the thick of clinicals and finals and just life in general, it's so easy for your days to start to run together. Is it Saturday or Wednesday?! What was I supposed to study this week and what will this test cover? STOP. Take a breath and look up. Look out the window at the kids riding their bikes- they look so happy and care free! Look at yourself in the mirror. Notice something you like about yourself today, or take a moment to try on that new lipstick or hair accessory. Pick up the phone and call a friend that you haven't had a chance to catch up with. Live in the moment. Realize the things actively going on around you! The life of a nurse (or nursing student) can get hectic and sometimes it gets hard to stop and take a breath. But you have to. Use your senses to take in all that is going around you.

7. Never forget to SMILE! The simplest and most effective thing you can do when you need to find some inner peace is to smile! Smiling costs nothing and requires almost no effort! It is a small gesture that can put someone at ease and can change a tense situation into peace. If you can do nothing else, you can do this..try it now!

The Right Now (RN)

Hi, I'm Vanisha and I'm......gonna be a Registered Nurse.

Welcome, I'm glad you're here! I created this blog to note my journey as I strive to be the best RN in the world. Really, the entire WORLD- I'm a newly motivated overachiever, so I'm aiming for Florence Nightengale status...or close to it.

So where do I start? Uhhh I guess I'll tell you a bit about me. My birthday is on Friday (October 23) and I'll be 33. Yes, I will be an old nurse...a great old nurse. What took me so long to pursue nursing? Well, I've always wanted to do it but in my younger days, I was all over the place, doing everything but going to nursing school. I've worked at hospitals, nursing homes, assisted living centers, and I've even treated hospice patients and briefly owned my own home care agency, So to say I've done it all is about accurate. Now, I want to be a registered nurse. All of the skills that I've picked up along the way make me more than qualified but I definitely don't have the classroom training, and I'm afraid to even look at an N-CLEX exam. I've taken a few classes here and there...one class during one semester here and there....I guess you could call me a professional student, but aren't we all???

So right now, I'm starting by getting my Certified Nursing Assistant license back. Yes, I'm starting from the bottom and working my way to the top. I'm definitely no stranger to hard work...or LOTS of work. I first got my CNA back in about 2001-ish. I had it all the way up to 2011 and then I went to work at a hospital that I absolutely despised from day one. {Sidebar: let this be a lesson to you-ALWAYS trust your instinct. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it}Instead of trusting my gut feeling and declining the job, I stayed and each day was worst than the last until eventually I blew my top and walked off the job at 4am. There went my CNA license for an entire year. After my suspension period was up, I didn't get my license back simply because I didn't want it. The sour taste from the hospital still hadn't left my soul. But I knew that nursing was my calling, so I continued to provide care in different capacities and BOOM here I am with you!

My hope is that I stuff this blog chock full of information that will help you to decide if nursing is for you and if so, I hope the info and experiences you read here will teach you something or at least make you smile.

I do also want to let you know that I welcome all info, tips, suggestions, or whatever. I'm a sharer! Feel free to say hi!!!

Until next time....